Updated: Jul 18, 2020
We all do it. We all avoid speaking about it. We all pretend like it won’t happen.
The reality is, we will all die in this lifetime. It is going to happen and yet it is like we ignore the huge living elephant in the room. But why?
10 reasons why we fear death.
1. Death is finite.
The heart stops and the body is done. The body is no longer functioning. The idea of death feels so absolute and so unknown.
The body is not longer occupied but where do we go?
Is it cold, dark and lonely or burning hot and fierce?
2. Responsible? No thanks.
We don’t like being responsible for the way we have lived. We hate ageing and all that it entails, constantly reminding us of the choices we have made as we have lived.
We avoid playing big because it means we have to be accountable and it is not in the rule book of life. Who wrote that anyway?
We have an opportunity every single day to be responsible and live deeply connected to our hearts and our bodies, but do we do this?
We are not willing to feel the fact that we may or will return. Again and again.
We know that we leave our bodies because a body becomes an empty shell when we pass over. But where do we pass over to? Do we return? Where do we return to? A different body but the same essence? Why would we return and would we be different if we knew that we came back to our own set up/mess to get a chance to correct it? Around and around we go…
We fear being alone.
Our fear of being lonely is heightened by the fact that we live in such disconnection here on earth. The illusion that we are dis-connected and not one, is a story we have told ourselves to avoid the sadness that we have for not feeling the true connection. Oh the irony. Not only are we all energetically connected to each other, but we are also connected to the magnificent all, beyond this realm.
5. Who am I?
We fear forgetting who we are. But haven’t we done that already? The state of human amnesia is convenient isn't it? What happens when we leave? Who am I if I am not in this body? Will I remember when I return? The being in the body lives its whole life avoiding being in the body and then fears returning to the body.
Gosh no wonder some people have issues around birthdays! Birthdays, that day we were born, remind us of our lack of commitment to life.
We long for connection.
The idea of death has a bazaar way of making us feel like we will be disconnected and no longer available or a part of the whole.
We long to delay the end of an unsatisfying life.
You know when you want to stay up late because you just haven’t quite felt the joy in the day? Yes well that, times 85 years. No wonder we start to disconnect so much younger and develop illness and diseases like dementia.
We are afraid of pain and illness and disease. Is it going to hurt? We keep hearing that anyway. All around us ageing is seen as a painful and an unsatisfying way to exist. So the moment of death must hurt too? Perhaps it is time to look at the day to day way we age and care for ourselves during the process of life.
9. Ignorance is bliss.
Death? If we don’t speak about it than perhaps it won’t exist?
Why are we not speaking about the most inevitable thing that we will all do? Why are we not seeing that the grace and dignity in which we die can be a beautiful gateway to a new dimension. Simply a movement we could say.
Why are we not understanding that when we do pass over we have a great opportunity to bless this world with what we have lived, parting with a movement of celebration for our essence and its contribution to the quality of all.
We fear what we don’t know. But we do actually know it all anyway? Do we just block our awareness from our conscious minds to avoid the expansion on offer.
11 reasons why we fear life.
1. Who am I?
Who am I in this life? What am I in every life? Being ourselves can be a pretty big ask. From birth we are taught to do otherwise. So it makes sense that we can feel afraid to live a life of truth and love where, no matter what the world says, we just keep shining and evolving.
2. You deserve it.
We are afraid to truly live the life we deserve. What do I deserve? We deserve to awaken and heal and deepen and expand. Like a lotus flower or a sunset or a cycle of the moon or season. It is our God given right to change and flourish. Is that not why we are here?
3. I see you and you see me.
We fear being seen. We fear to be truly known for who we are because that may change the arrangement with all others. We fear intimacy. 'In to me I see'. If we were willing to be seen, then the steps to the dance we move to, with all our family and friends and colleagues, would change. We would be under the flashlight, in the limelight and on the stage of life. Not for being clever or good or a hard worker but for being truly who we are. Real. The game would be up and we would no longer be players.
4. I Love Me.
We are afraid to be open and deeply love ourselves and to be loved.
Being open, truly open would risk being hurt wouldn’t it? We cannot risk being hurt because we know how that feels. It’s painful, we can feel a lack of self worth and feelings of rejection and abandonment. But what stops us from truly loving, regardless of the past? We stop ourselves from being love. We set ourselves up to be unloving or rejected or shut down. We can feel the complex tapestry we weave. It is a set up.
5. We fear change
Every moment of our lives is a movement. We move with our heart beats and bodies to a rhythm. We move through life along with 7 billion others and more. Life is a constant changing body of people, nature and environment and we are a part of these changing movements in every single second of the day. But to move is to change and we fear advancing. So it makes sense that the fact that our bodies grow, age and then finally have a redundant finish, completely scares us to death. Pun intended.
6. It is true.
We fear waking up to what is true. What is the truth? Why would we fear the truth? We are not just bodies really are we? We are beings in bodies. We are magnificent beings that are playing small in the game of life. We are beyond what we say we are. We all know this too. Yet we play so small. We play like life is all about achievements and recognition and having the ‘good’ life, meanwhile we are luminous light beings walking around hiding from each other and our own beauty and deeper connection to our souls. When you are a diamond and pretend you are a rock it cannot feel great to admit, can it?
7. We fear knowing who we truly
Who are we?
We are glorious beings. We are so sensitive and strong and majestic and infinitely loved. We are from beyond the stars with a depth of wisdom that is deeper than any ocean and more expansive than the endless sky.
We are all connected in a way that we are yet to understand and this may take a little trust and time for us to understand. We are every constellation of the stars and we are all here to work together as one, awakening to then move on to our next awakening.
Responsibility has been made a dirty dark word. It often represents a heaviness and a burdened way of life and living. But what if being responsible meant being who we truly are? Appreciating all that we bring to this world? Opening up and healing and shining like the sun? What if being responsible meant being willing to not always be liked, especially if that meant staying true to what is true and supporting others to also rise up out of the depth of darkness they have become familiar with.
9. Heal the wound.
We are afraid to heal our hurts
Healing our hurts means taking that responsibility and owning it. Letting go of blaming others and dropping the protection and resentment and distraction. The wounds can’t heal if we don’t admit they are there.
10. The game is up.
Life is a game. We can also see it as a school. Life is a playground to awaken in and we are afraid to no longer play the game. But the tension and the rules are killing us anyway. The game is up. We can keep playing though, and it is like the bell has gone and playtime is over and we just keep hanging around for something greater to happen, forgetting that we are that great thing that is happening in the first place.
So as we have become aware that with our fear of death, the same is true of our fear of life. We fear change but change just may be our ticket to freedom? Is changing our alignment to what drives us, the key? Changing our old patterns and ways? Healing our hurts? Awakening and being our true selves? Appreciating the depth of who and what we are?
Could living our lives with a quality and standard that asks us to be the fiery beings in the body, be the answer to accepting death?
If we loved ourselves and each other and our lives to the max, like truly went there, then when the time came to gently depart from this body would we be ready to go? Would we be willing to move to the next realm, check in with God, the Masters, The Angels and more and prepare to then return to earth? Maybe we would? Because, God knows we could do with a little support back here on earth now couldn’t we? If we truly loved humanity we would be willing to return to support each other to all awaken and get out of here together. It is only natural.
We are all students of life. So than, is death simply asking us to commit to life? Ignite the fire you have within, and burn with all cylinders blazing? Death is a fact of life, a part of life, death is life just in another dimension before we return again and again until we close this game and move on to our next awakening.
If we commit to live life in every way that is true and deeply honouring then by the end of our days we will be ready to move on with all the grace and beauty that we truly are.
With love and a commitment to our livingness. K.